Today's an interesting day.
We all woke up early (or at least early for us home-dwellers) and drove to RDU. The girls are on a 9:30 flight to PHL. There, they will meet up with Grammy and Grampy. Luggage and car seats will be exchanged, as will the child. JewelrySlut will go back into the airport and wait for a 2:05 flight back to RDU.
She's quite a jet setter isn't she? After today, we won't see Shmuppie until August 30. 2 weeks. The longest we've ever been away from her is one week when we went to St John in 2004. 2 weeks is a long time. I suspect we'll miss her at some point, but for now, honestly, I need a Shmuppie vacation.
This is what I won't miss:
"turn around and eat. turn around and eat. turn around and eat. turn around and eat. turn around and eat. turn around and eat. turn around and eat. turn around and eat. turn around and eat."
"Jesus Christ! Did you piss your pants again?"
"Shmuppie Shmuppie Shmuppie Shmuppie Shmuppie Shmuppie Shmuppie"
"Yes. I know there was a frog in the skimmer. But, honestly honey, that was like over a month ago. Can we please get over it?"
And more. But, even typing it hurts my soul. I mean, I love the kid more than anything else, but it's time for a vacation from each other. She's taken her bad behavior to 11 lately. Of course, she's spending 2 weeks with the source of said bad behavior, but what can we do? We need a week on an island, tucked comfortably into a bottle of rum.
I will miss her though:
The "best hugs"
The kiss routine at bed time (lips, cheek, cheek, nose, lips)
Watching Good Eats with her
Going to the pool
Staring in wonder at whatever nonsense is coming out of her mouth.
But, we need a vacation.
Also on the docket for today is White Trash Carnival Day here in North Raleigh.
The people who had the wedding back in June are being evicted. They haven't paid rent in since roughly forever and the landlord has asked them to move. They responded by gutting the kitchen and selling it to a neighbor. They then installed it upside down and backwards in the neighbor's house. Then they got in several fistfights among themselves out in the parking lot. The cops were called a few times. Their kids randomly wandered into our house. I had to throw White Trash Winnie (she of the short shorts that make me a little sterile) out of the pool over and over again. Today's supposed to be the day. I know this because the landlord (a guy who used to live next door before the Horse Slobs moved in) calls me constantly to whine at me. I, of course, send him emails like "Take their pool keys now or you will be fined". "They dropped an oven (yes folks...an oven) in the parking lot and if you don't clean it up, you will be fined". "They're a menace and if you don't control (everyone with me now), you will be fined".
Really, it's kinda fun.
I'm trying to wrap up some loose ends with the fucktards on the Board. They, as usual, are very helpful. One, the Rev, is accusing the management of trying to rip us off. Another has become obsessed (in a Howard Hughes way) with having cars towed from the parking lot. One's been on the Board for 14 straight years and is just a lump of a person who irritates me. The other 3 I don't have the strength to discuss. Why am I doing this?
And, for fun, the 2 little Street Urchins in the White Trash Carnival just broke into my basement. I keep the back doors unlocked (oh yea) during the day. Well, they opened the gate to our backyard, opened the slider and appeared. I happened to hear footsteps on the padded tiles in Shmuppie's playroom and spun out of my chair. I think I scared the shit out of them. I then walked them home and told Mom that I had castaways in my basement and that Shmuppie was not home. (And to watch her fucking kids a little more closely). Fun. I can't wait until the Sheriff arrives later with the landlord to evict them. I just hope I can get pictures. It ought to be fun.
Well, the girls should be on the ground by now and I have yet another conference call to attend. In 3 days, I'll be nearly an hour into my flight from Atlanta to St Thomas.