2005-10-27 - 4:19 p.m.

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Good morning, this is NoGoodDaddy

Hi, NoGoodDaddy, this is J from PlacementCompany, how are you?

I�m OK. How can I help you?

I�m calling about Wombat. I am working to place him in a job and he listed you as a professional reference from your time at HealthCareRelatedCompany. Do you have a few minutes?

Sure, no problem. What can I tell you about Wombat?

Well, how long did you work together?

We worked from late last year until about June of this year when I moved to North Carolina. He was the 2nd shift supervisor of our print and mail facility.

OK. His resume says that in his time with HealthCareRelatedCompany that he cured the common cold, set a world record for longest time with an erection, maintained a safe work environment, met OSHA standards and was generally the greatest person on Earth.

Oh, yes, that�s 100% correct. Wombat is a gem of a human. I�d be wiling to abolish democracy in order to have him rule the planet. He�s made for it.

Interesting. That�s very good to know. The position we�re considering him for calls for a lot of those qualities. The last person in his position was so lax that he got someone killed.

Oh, Wombat is very safety oriented. In fact, he instituted a safety policy at HealthCareRelatedCompany that I hear has been implemented at the corporate level.

Oh, can you tell me about it?

Sure. I�m a little unsure of all the details, but I believe that what he did was get all of his staff members to fellate him on a nightly basis. After a period of conditioning, they were all very docile and, as a result, very safe. J, do you think that the fact that most of Wombat�s employees were men makes him gay? You know�with the blowjobs and all?

I don�t think so. Not at all. Why do you ask?

No reason. I was just curious.

OK, moving on. Would you say there would be any constructive criticism that we could pass on about Wombat to a potential employer?

Oh, you bet your ass there is. See, he�s got an incredible flatulence problem. The guy can�t seem to stop farting. Remember Pig Pen from Charlie Brown? Imagine that; but it�s a shit smell. It�s quite offensive.

Interesting. I�ll pass that along. Have you ever seen Wombat�s genitals?

Indeed I have. They are exquisite. For a man of his girth, I�d have expected more, but his use of color and faux finishes really makes up for the small size. I think that shows that he would be an excellent employee for the company�did you say it manufactured butt plugs?

I did.

See, that�s what I mean. Anyone who can dress up such a small penis is perfect for the butt plug industry. Did I mention that Wombat can lick his own asshole?

He can?

It�s amazing. I watch a lot of porn and I�ve never seen it done. He�s very impressive.

I�ll note that in his file. Well, NoGoodDaddy, I thank you for your time. I really think that Wombat is a good fit to be Chief Rim Wiper at Butt Plug USA. The information you provided will help a great deal.

Well, it�s really no problem. Wombat�s a good guy. I mean, after you look past the head that�s growing from his abdomen. I hope it works out well for him.

Click

I hope Wombat gets the job. He sounds like he needs a break. We spoke yesterday and he sounded like he needs a break. So, big hugs to Wombat.

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Another day in the pool today. I won�t go so far as to say that there�s any noticeable difference yet, but I�m feeling more at home in the water. It�s coming back. I can feel it. It feels good.

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