What a past 2 or 3 days. Jesus Christ, it�s been insane.
Work is bonkers. I�m not really bothered, except that I�m kept from D-Landing. That bothers me.
There�s a lot of stupid work that needs to get done and, for some reason, it�s all falling to me to do. I don�t care, but it�s tedious.
Yesterday I was at our main vendor all day. It was funny. I got to see exactly how little the people here know about anything. This vendor is ass-raping us and we don�t even see it. I do, but nobody listens to me. Plus, production lets sales run all over them and, as a result, nothing can get done because everything�s a rush and needs to be done NOW. When everything�s a #1 priority, nothing is. I�ve used that line on sales people many times. If you can�t prioritize, I will. And you may or may not like what I do.
So, after my visit, I run to the lawyer to drop off all the paperwork. While I�m doing so, I�m told that we�re still in attorney review. Excuse me? I thought we�ve been out since Friday of last week� Well, it seems that something wrong is gong on. So, I call the Ninny who proceeds to tell me that she�s known about this all along but didn�t want to worry us. Excuse me? What? So, I play phone tag with her for a while. She�s a gem to talk to on the phone. First off, I�m not sure she knows how a phone works. She often will have one of us on the hone while she talks to someone completely different. Or, she�s giving us answers to questions asked by that other person. It�s a lot of fun.
I think I got the story this morning. Our buyers are selling their house. Initially, they didn�t say that they needed to sell their house to buy ours. There would be no contingency in the deal. We were totally cool with that. Yesterday, it seems that maybe they need the contingency back in. Now, if it had been that way from the start, we�d have been fine. In most cases people need to sell one house to buy another. Who has the money to carry 2 mortgages? But, adding it back in after a week of dick wagging is not cool. Plus, the realtor can�t get the story straight and the buyers� attorney has vanished.
Here�s what�s happening (didn�t I just start that paragraph up there?): They�re selling their house. They�re listed with Foxtons. Foxtons, because of their low commission structure, only pays another realtor 1%. As a result, other realtors don�t like to even show Foxtons houses because it�s not worth it to them. So, the buyers� (of our buyers) attorney is trying to hold up the sellers (again, our buyers) for another % point. That�s not cool and maybe isn�t legal. Fortunately, they have another buyer all lined up and are saying �Take it or fuck off�. Then, they tell our lawyer that they want the contingency back in. He says no (without asking us first, mind you). Then, they take it back out, but their lawyer isn�t saying it officially. Meanwhile, we have plane tickets for Saturday and have to find a place to live in NC. The Ninny is telling us not to do anything yet. JewelrySlut told her �It�s not like we can load a truck and drive to North Carolina and announce �Hi, we live here now��. I think our agent wants us to be cautious, but we�re over a week and a half into a 6-week time period�it�s time to start doing things. But, NinnyLips keeps telling us a different story. Our attorney keeps telling us to re-list the house and tell the buyers that we�re doing so. I�d do it, but, as you all know, they�re the only people to even feign interest in the house. Nobody else would come along. Our buyers really want the place. She (buyer) is 6 months pregnant and they have either a 7 or 10 month old (Either way, they were fucking on the birthing table) and they want to move the baby-to-be into our house. So, they�re anxious, but are getting jerked around. We�re more than anxious and have no fucking clue.
Then, I have my whole work situation. I gambled right away and made it known what was happening. I figured that the odds on the deal going to shit were slim. I�d be better off letting them know in the hopes of scoring either continued employment or a consultant deal. Well, they�re still dragging ass over all of this. They can�t make up their minds. As I keep saying �Keep me and we work things out for a few months. Don�t and the whole production operation I oversee stops. Dead. Turn out the lights because it�s over.� That�s not a pat on my back, it�s the truth. Our old manager set it up that way so I had no backup. I can�t train someone in 2 weeks. And I won�t do it. So, I�m waiting here for them to make up their minds and to see if the deal is happening.
Then there�s JewelrySlut. Let�s call her boss CuntyCunt (Do I offend?) for now. She does so because she is. She�s a twit who is blocking JewelrySlut from advancing. All the boss wants to do is her nails and her boss. All JewelrySlut wants to do is quit. She can�t, and hasn�t because she has the insurance and because my work situation�s been tenuous at best for like 9 years. Lately CuntyCunt has been cutting JewelrySlut out of projects, poaching her staff to go on junkets, and making her do secretarial work. My wife�s not a moron. If you buy something from LittleBlueBox Company, you expect a certain, ridiculous level of quality. The shit ain�t cheap. Who do you think makes sure it�s real? That�s right�JewelrySlut. Is your gold really gold? Ask her. Will the glaze on the plates kill you? Ask her. Are those stones real? Ask her. She knows. And her boss knows nothing. She doesn�t even know what the machines are in the lab that she manages. She buys machines that don�t know what they need them to do because they�re cute (I shit you not). Guess who figures out how to make the machines do what is needed? That�s right�JewelrySlut. So, she�s nearly in tears on most days out of sheer frustration. And, now the house deal looks hinky�
And then, there�s the housing situation in NC. Jesus Christ, this is not easy. I guess it�s what you get for moving to such an area. We�re trying to rent for like 6 months. We�d most like to get a house and not a condo or something so Shmuppie has room to roam. As soon as we find one, it�s gone. We find one and they don�t take cats. We find another and they want a 5-year lease. Who the fuck rents a 3BR house for 5 years? I keep sending our realtor down there listings and she keeps telling us no. If it wasn�t for the fact that she�s British and has a potty mouth, I�d be mad at her. Instead, I�m falling in love. So, we maybe have 3 houses to look at while were there. There are countless apartment/townhouse places that we�ll look at also. It�s gong to be a fun weekend.
So, we�re stressed beyond belief. There�s so much to do and seemingly, so little time. I want to start packing nut know that if I do, the sight of empty rooms or full boxes will make me very twitchy. The 3 of us are snapping at each other and that�s never good.
So�we took Shmuppie to the doctor the other day for her 3 year checkup. She�s a monstrous 36� and 19lbs. Right�she�s a little thing. She gained 4 inches and 4 lbs in the past year. She eats enough, but she�s also constantly running around the house. Other than a nasty ass-rash, she�s in good health.
Know what�s really bad about all this nonsense lately? I have no fucking clue when I�ll see Revenge of the Sith. I don�t know where or when I�ll go. JewelrySlut has told me to go it alone, but I�d rather she join me. I don�t have tickets yet and it may be too late. 6 years ago, the release of Menace was all encompassing in my life. 3 years ago, JewelrySlut slept through Clones. Of course, it was a week or so after Shmuppie was born so she was tired or something. Funny how it�s the stupid shit that proves just how life has a way of changing on you.
I think we�re throwing ourselves a party before we go. You�re all invited. Really, I could maybe expect Pimp or Dangerspouse to show up�maybe Wombat. But, for the rest, if you�re in Warren County NJ over Memorial Day Weekend, let me know. You�re invited. I think we�re giving away furniture as party favors.