Jesus-H-Fucking Christ am I ever pissed off this morning. I was planning on writing about how proud I was to have been hung-over on consecutive Sundays since college and regale everyone with tales of wine-drinking bliss. I could also have talked about how I actually got my car to pass inspection this morning or about the fact that Northern NJ now looks like Iowa. That is, of course, assuming that Iowa floods when it rains. I have decided that it does, so fucking blow me if I�m wrong. I mean it, put my cock in your mouth and blow the fuck away. As I mentioned, I�m pissed off.
Here�s why:
And I paste an email from NoGoodFather:
Good morning, NoGoodSon. So, did you make it through to
> the end? I felt that Illinois had blown too much
> energy on the comeback and I think that, along with
> the inability to control May, did them in.
deleted non-related nonsense�(we didn�t watch a second of the game)
When the time presents itself to rethink your house
> situation, I am certain that Mom has suggestions you
> might consider. To this point, I sense she has held
> back, awaiting some indication from JewelrySlut and you
> that you would welcome her suggestions. Remember,
> NoGoodSon, Mom has an eye for things and she certainly
> knows how to best present a home ... any home!
And that�s why I�m pissed. This is how my parents deal with me. They don�t offer to help with anything. They always have opinions, some of which may be useful, but don�t say anything because they want to be asked to help. Is anyone out there a shrink? What is it with behavior like this? They will never help us unless asked. Afterwards, when we�re done doing whatever we�re doing, they come and say �We would have liked to help, but you never asked. You should have done this, that, and the other thing, but you never asked us and we certainly didn�t want to force our opinions on to you.�
I can�t even recall when else this has been done because I�m half-blind with rage right now. Oh yea, when we bought the house in question back in 1998, as soon as we were done, they came up and said �We would have liked to help you with buying the house as it relates to getting the best price and knowing what to ask about, but you never asked us first. So, good luck with what you got�
So, I read the above email as such:
�We know you really want to move because you see it as a great opportunity for your family. However, we don�t want you, (and when we say �you�, you�d be insane to think it�s you and JewelrySlut because it�s really Shmuppie) to move far away. So, we�re going to do nothing to help you even though we think there are things you can do to make the house more sellable. Instead, we�ll sit back here in our mansion and be prepared to tell you how stupid you are when the dust settles. We hope you learn something from this. We like watching you 2 be upset and depressed. It makes us feel better about our failing marriage and inability to find happiness.�
Let�s backtrack for a minute or 3 and let me give you the brief history of the NoGoodFamily (Part 2 I think).
In the late 70�s NoGoodFather was transferred from NJ to California. After a year out there, his job moved and he was working in NJ again but living in CA. He spent like 2-3 weeks each month on the other coast, my mother at home with me and the infant SecretAgentBrother. After a year and a half of that, we were moved back to NJ. Guess what happened? Yup� job moved back to CA. So, he�d go out west for 2-3 weeks each month. After a while more of this, he switched jobs. He eventually landed in the hospital administration business in the late 80�s and was making really good money for that time or any other. After a while, that didn�t work and during my Junior and Senior years of high school, the NoGoodFather was out of work (still making a 6-figure salary in severance I�ll add).
During that time, I pretty much stopped talking with my parents. I don�t think they were prepared to raise a teen-ager. I was going to a very expensive private school and began to feel entitled to certain things. I�ll admit that it was wrong, but it happened.
I didn�t get those things because we were poor.
We lived in a 6000 square foot house in central NJ but were to poor to go on vacations, eat meat, do anything fun.
I was 16 and very selfish. I wanted more. My friends had a lot more. I wanted it.
We also took in an exchange student from Italy who lived with us for like 8 years. He became, in my eyes, the #1 son, and I found myself as the family�s Jan Brady. I was one pissed off little dude.
Then, they tell me that I have to go to Rutgers for college. I don�t get to choose, it�s RU or nothing. When one lives in NJ, attends a private school and is told that one is going to the armpit of NJ for college, one gets more pissed.
***Side note of good news. Because of that decision, I didn�t go to a smaller school. Had I done so, I would have been on a swim team (I was a very good swimmer in high school). Had I done that, I wouldn�t have spent the summer of 1992 working as a lifeguard at a Day Camp. If I don�t do that, I don�t meet a certain girl who has made every day of my life since June 28, 1992 better than the one before. That girl is in the never-ending process of rebuilding me into a better person***
So, I go off to school, NoGoodFather buys a business with a partner he hates. 8 years later, in a lovely twist of fate, having sold said business, I am sued by the new owners and nearly bankrupt my little family. He finds new work and continues to hate every day of it. NoGoodMother keeps moving them every 4 years because there�s no pleasing her. Fast forward to June of 2004 when NoGoodMother announces that she�s never been happy in all of her marriage and wants out. NoGoodFather is devastated because he has put aside everything he ever wanted to do to provide for a woman who has told him �It was never enough and I�ve been unhappy since day 1�. 3 weeks later, they�re happy again. This comes after they tell me that I�m one of the big reasons why they�re having marriage troubles. Fast forward again to now, and here we are, me getting told that they�d love to help us sell our house, but they want us to ask them for help first.
So, here I am, sitting here at work seething because, again, they�re killing me. Why are they trying to make me crazy? The real crazy thins is that I think they�re doing this all �for my own good�. I can�t tell you how many times I�ve been told that I think I know everything and that they don�t tell me things on purpose so I can fall down and hopefully learn from it. Who the fuck parents like that? I swear here and before everyone, I will NEVER do that to Shmuppie. I will always support her. I will never tell her she�s not good at something in the hopes that I can shame her into doing better. I�ll never threaten her if her grades aren�t good enough. I�ll never tell her that if she does A, I�ll refuse to do B. I will not be the parents that mine were to me. I will do a better job.
And, while I do so, I hope they see every minute of it and see what they did wrong. And when the time finally comes that I tell them to go to hell for once and for all, I hope they know why. I know that deep down somewhere, the NoGoodFather knows it�s coming and knows why it will come. He�s just too loyal to the NoGoodMother to stop it from happening. It�s going to be their loss.
Now, I want to move to Raleigh. I was all set to continue my work here at HealthcareRelated Company and climb the ladder. I�m on the path. I could do good things here and be able to support my family. I think I may be willing to throw that away to get away from my parents.
That�s not healthy.
AND� someone here at work is fucking up royally and I�m getting left with the mess to clean. It�s not you for once, Wombat . And, to help things, rather than help me clean up said mess, the others here are telling me not to clean it because it�s not my job to do so. If I don�t fix it today, I�ll just have to fix it later. And then, when later comes, I�ll have all kinds of people on my ass about it and I�m not like FeygFaceFeyggityFeyg and I don�t like people piling on my ass.